One Lost, A Lesson Learned: Moving on After Losing Someone

This past week has been one of the toughest of my life. My boyfriend of nearly seven months broke up with me. I didn’t see it coming, so that made it all the more difficult for me. When we first broke up, it felt like the end of the world. I cried. A lot. But as the week went on, I started to pick myself up. I realized that there wasn’t anything a little Taylor Swift or Olivia Rodrigo couldn’t fix. 

Losing someone is quite literally one of the hardest things I’ve ever experienced. Might it be losing a loved one, ending a friendship, or breaking up with a significant other, moving on is really difficult. But losing someone does not mean you have to give up on everything. Sure, it’s perfectly normal to be sad and not want to do anything after losing someone; I, for one, slept and cried almost every day following my breakup. However, it’s important to learn how to persist through it all. 

One of the ways I’ve been coping with my breakup has been by listening to a lot of music. I think music is one of the telling signs of how you’re feeling. Yes, you can listen to whatever music you’d like, but I usually put on Fearless (Taylor’s Version) when I’m sad and Lover when I’m feeling happy. When I put on music, I can usually just zone out of the real world and focus on my thoughts and emotions. Taylor Swift has a song called “Breathe” that is all about moving on after you lose someone. It goes, “I can’t breathe without you, but I have to.” This specific lyric has helped me so much this past week. As much as it absolutely sucks to lose someone you love, you have to keep going and “breathe.” Sometimes, things have to get harder before they get easier.

Another thing I find helpful when coping with a loss is just leaving the situation. One day recently, I felt absolutely horrible. I had just finished class and wanted to sleep. I was just laying in my bed and thinking about what might have gone wrong in my relationship. By chance, I had practice for track and field about 30 minutes after school, and, while I did not want to go, I made myself put on my workout clothes and go to practice. After a nice run and workout, I felt much better than I did before practice. I know this may sound like I’m telling you to go and join a sport or run, but that is just what works for me. Do what you love. I love running, but for you, you may like reading, writing, knitting, or binging the latest Marvel show (you might want to avoid WandaVision if you’re experiencing heartbreak like me though, haha.) When you are feeling too down, it is often best to get up and do what you love.

 This might be a hot take, but I really like organizing and decorating. I love to find cool posters on the internet to print and cut for my room. I like to make everything “aesthetic.” It can also be really fun to put together playlists for you or your friends and really put thought into them. I know I have friends who organize the art they draw or their binders. For me, organizing my things and decorating makes me feel like I’m putting my life back together after feeling like it fell apart. 

 Moving on is truly a difficult task, but it is possible. Before you can do something for someone else, you have to be able to do it for yourself. You have to make yourself proud before you can make another person proud. Things will get better, even if it doesn’t feel that way now. Losing someone is incredibly hard, but you will come out of that friendship or relationship a stronger person and knowing more than you did before. My mom always tells me that people come into your life to either stick around or to teach you a lesson. You just have to make sure you learn from that because that will help make you a stronger person, and you will come out victorious.