GretaRecently, I woke up to see yet another job rejection in my email inbox. Since graduating with my Master’s degree in Journalism three months ago, I have applied to more than fifty jobs. So far, I’ve received 15 rejection letters and have been left without a response from many other companies.
Everyone experiences rejection at some point, whether it’s related to a job, college, or a relationship. It can be challenging. According to VeryWell Mind, it can make us feel inadequate or doubt our ability to achieve our goals. However, rejection can also serve as an opportunity for reflection and redirection.
Lately, when I receive a rejection letter, I work on reframing my thoughts. Rather than feeling upset that I didn’t get the job, I remind myself that it simply wasn’t the right fit. I’ll never truly know if the job would have been right for me since I’m not in that position.
The same principle applies to college rejections. Although it can be disheartening to be turned down by colleges, especially by your dream school, you’ll never truly know what the experience would have been like. You might have loved it or found it disappointing. Since it didn’t work out, there’s no sense in dwelling on what might have been, as you’ll never know for certain.
Similar advice can help you reframe your thoughts on relationships. When you ask someone out and face rejection, it can be painful. Romantic rejection can sometimes trick you into believing you’re not good enough or that others won’t want to be with you. It’s important to feel your emotions while also recognizing your worth. One person saying no to a romantic relationship with you doesn’t mean that you’re destined to be alone. They may just not be the right person for you.
For people with mental health conditions, childhood trauma, or autism, rejection may cause more severe emotional pain, according to VeryWell Mind. Even if you feel emotional pain intensely, there are strategies to help you cope with rejection.
After getting turned down, try not to blame yourself. Letting go of self-blame can help you heal from the emotional pain that comes with rejection. While it can be hard to do, remind yourself that some things are out of your control and if you tried your best, that’s all you can do.
Rejection can also be an opportunity for growth. Could you better prepare for your next interview or have someone proofread your college admissions essay? Rejection can highlight areas for improvement and motivate you to make positive changes. It’s also important to remember your past successes. One moment of rejection doesn’t define you. Reflect on the times you achieved significant goals despite facing setbacks.
Beyond reframing your thoughts, allow yourself to feel your feelings and practice self-care. If you try to ignore your feelings or bottle them up, they may come back more intensely. According to Psychology Today, you should treat yourself with compassion and talk to yourself like you would a friend. Having empathy toward yourself can help you move forward and keep your self-esteem intact.
Above all, remember that feelings of rejection are temporary. You will move forward, set new goals, and achieve more in the future. What might be perceived initially as a “setback” could turn out to be a redirection towards the right path for you. While rejection is never easy to experience, learning to cope with it and bounce back will serve you well throughout your life.
Works Cited
Marschall, Amy. “How to Deal with Rejection.” Verywell Mind, 1 Apr. 2023, verywellmind.com/how-to-deal-with-rejection-7260048.
Maidenberg, Michelle. “8 Ways to Recover from Rejection.” Psychology Today, Sussex Publishers, 30 Jan. 2024, psychologytoday.com/us/blog/being-your-best-self/202401/8-ways-to-manage-rejection?msockid=0849d45d7f33607734acc0867ef161a8.
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