This will be my 23rd Valentines Day. It will also be my 23rd Valentines Day single.
I’m not the go-to person for relationship advice, but I do know that in my life, my friends are the most important people to me…besides my family of course. And my cat.
I would be lying if I said I always wanted to be single. I had some pretty ridiculous crushes in high school and in my first year of college that makes Helga from Hey Arnold! look innocent.
However, I’ve found that my single status helps me cherish moments and make memories with my friends. I’m not saying being single is inherently better than being in a relationship, but I think it is an important essence of finding out who I am as a person, what my values are, and where I want to go in life. I also feel that because I’ve had this time to reflect on these values, I am able to better see who I might be a better fit with in a partner, going in with a clear vision and intent. As Gandalf the Grey says:
I believe in love and romance, and I think it is perfectly fine and important to date in college if you wish, but I also think that we need to take care of ourselves and make sure that our relationships are healthy, and that we’re happy. And for me, that is hanging out with my best friends.
Sometimes we get so involved in our love lives that we forget that there is a world of possibilities outside of that relationship. Sometimes, this isolation can be unhealthy…just look at Gollum. He couldn’t wait to get that ring.
I feel that a lot of people, especially young people, get a lot of flack for being single. But in reality, it’s awesome. We pretty much get to do whatever we want, when we want. Maybe someday I’ll find someone to share my life with, but right now, in my early 20s, I believe that this is the time to find my identity. Soon I’ll have a job and have to figure out how to pay taxes. Until then, I’ll enjoy my adventure now, wherever that leads me.